Gaining Miles: A Miles Family Novella (The Miles Family Book 5) Read online

  Gaining Miles

  A Miles Family Novella

  Claire Kingsley

  Copyright © 2019 by Claire Kingsley

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. Any names, characters, places, or incidents are products of the author’s imagination and used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual people, places, or events is purely coincidental or fictionalized.

  Published by Always Have, LLC

  Edited by Elayne Morgan of Serenity Editing Services

  Cover by Cassy Roop of Pink Ink Designs

  www.clairekingsleybooks.com

  Created with Vellum

  For all my readers who loved Ben and Shannon from the start. This is for you.

  Contents

  Keep in touch with CK

  About this book

  1. Ben

  2. Ben

  3. Shannon

  4. Ben

  5. Shannon

  6. Ben

  7. Shannon

  8. Shannon

  9. Ben

  10. Shannon

  11. Shannon

  12. Ben

  Epilogue

  Bonus Epilogue

  Afterword

  Acknowledgments

  Also by Claire Kingsley

  About the Author

  Keep in touch with CK

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  About this book

  “Now there was nothing holding me back. I kissed her deeply, passionately. Kissed her for every time I’d wanted to and couldn’t. For every time I’d stared at her with longing in my heart, wishing we could be where we were now.”

  It’s never too late.

  Loving a woman you can’t have isn’t easy. I endured the slow torture of watching Shannon Miles live a life with another man—a man who didn’t deserve her—but I don’t regret a minute of it. And I have my reasons.

  Now, she’s free. No longer shackled to a loveless marriage, bound to someone who was unfaithful and heartless.

  But Shannon thinks her time has passed. That she won’t get another chance at love, especially not with the man who’s been there to see it all. The hurt. The mistakes. The heartache.

  If only she knew. I love that woman with everything I am, and I want nothing more in this life than to spend every moment with her.

  It’s time for our happily ever after.

  One

  Ben

  Twenty-six years ago

  The sound of a giggling toddler was unexpected this deep in the vineyard. I’d come out here to walk among the vines. Find some solitude in the fragrant late-summer air. The other workers had gone in, and I hadn’t seen a soul. So why did I suddenly hear a baby’s laugh?

  The owners had kids, but I’d never seen them up close. Kept my distance from the family, although they lived here, on this beautiful piece of property. But getting to know people wasn’t why I was here. I was here to disappear.

  That, and make a little money. A man needed to eat, after all. And a job working at a winery in a tiny town in the mountains was as good a job as any. Better than most, really. Not many questions. Hard work, but I wasn’t afraid of that. And space. Lots of space. Perfect for days like today when the weight on my shoulders felt like it might crush me.

  Walking helped.

  There was that baby giggle again. I stopped and a bee buzzed past my ear. Had I imagined it? Was I further gone than I’d thought? It had sounded like a little boy.

  “Mama?”

  There was no quaver in that little voice. No indication he was scared. I walked up the row of vines, in the direction of the sound. Leaves rustled. Then a bump.

  Rounding a corner, I saw the source of the noise. A little boy, naked as the day he was born, sitting in the dirt. He had wispy light brown hair, pudgy cheeks, and a round belly. He looked up at me with enormous blue eyes—eyes that seemed to hold the entire sky—and smiled. Dimples puckered his cheeks, and he laughed.

  “I dirty,” he said, holding out his hands for me to see. They were indeed covered with dirt.

  “You sure are. What are you doing out here by yourself, little man?”

  He didn’t answer, just kept grinning at me.

  “Where’s your mommy?” I asked.

  “I dunno.” He gave me a dramatic shrug, dirty palms up, his blue eyes big and wide.

  He must have been one of the Miles kids. They had a few. Three boys, if I recalled. This one was probably about two years old.

  I glanced around, my ears straining for the sound of footsteps. His mother had to be close by. We were a long way from the main grounds and the house where the Miles family lived. How did this little guy get out here?

  “Bye-bye!”

  My head whipped around just in time to see the naked little boy disappearing between the vines.

  “Oh shit.”

  I darted after him. He wasn’t my kid—and seeing him dug at wounds I’d have much rather left buried—but I couldn’t just leave him. I couldn’t get through the gap, so I ran up ahead and doubled back. He wasn’t far ahead, but those chubby little legs moved fast. He cast a glance back at me, squealed at the top of his lungs, and ran faster.

  “You little stinker.”

  A few long strides and I was on him. I scooped him up, ignoring his flailing arms and kicking legs. He laughed hysterically, like we were playing the best game.

  His laugh was infectious. How long had it been since I’d laughed? I couldn’t remember. It rumbled deep in my chest, as if it was clearing cobwebs out of my soul.

  “All right kid. Let’s go find your mama.”

  “Mama?”

  “Yeah, little man. Where is she?”

  “Home,” he said happily.

  I highly doubted she was all the way back at the family home. But I didn’t see any sign of her as I headed toward the main grounds. The little boy stopped struggling, so I adjusted him, holding him upright on my hip. It occurred to me that I had no idea if the kid was potty trained.

  “Don’t pee on me, okay, little man?”

  “Outside,” he said. “I go pee outside.”

  He sounded so proud of himself, I couldn’t help but laugh again. “Good for you. I suppose that’s as good a place as any.”

  Finally, the vineyard opened to the main grounds. A few vineyard workers were heading back toward the cellars, but no sign of the kid’s parents. Taking him home was probably my best option. I just hoped his mom wasn’t out in the vineyard behind me, looking for him.

  “Cooper?” A woman’s voice rang out from somewhere to my left, a note of panic in her tone. “Cooper? Baby boy, where’d you go? Cooper?”

  “Are you Cooper?” I asked.

  He nodded. “Mama?”

  “Yeah, let’s go see Mama.”

  I hurried in the direction of her voice. She called out again, the fear in her tone spurring me to move faster.

  “Ma’am,” I called out. “Ma’am, I think I have you
r son.”

  She burst out from a trail, sweat gleaming on her forehead, her eyes wide with worry. “Oh my god, Cooper.”

  He reached for her, practically diving out of my arms. She caught him, like the expert toddler-wrangler she obviously was.

  “Cooper, you can’t run away like that. You have to stay with Mommy.” She held him close, pressing one hand to his back.

  “I dirty,” he said, looking proud as ever of his dirty hands.

  “I see that. Where are your clothes?”

  “I don’t know. I like naked.”

  She let out a heavy sigh, her eyes darting up, like she was asking the Lord for strength. “I know you like being naked. But baby boy, you need to leave your clothes on. More importantly, you need to stay with Mommy. I was scared to death.”

  “He got me,” Cooper said, pointing straight at me.

  His mother looked at me, her features softening. She was beautiful, with long dark hair and clear blue eyes. My heart squeezed at the sight of her, my chest aching with a feeling I hadn’t experienced in a long time. I hadn’t been sure there was still a heart in there. It reminded me of its existence now, thumping so hard it made the blood roar in my ears.

  “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you so much. I’m so sorry, Cooper’s a handful. I only turned my back for a second.”

  “It’s no trouble. I saw him out there and figured a naked two-year-old probably belonged to someone nearby.”

  She nodded, adjusting Cooper on her hip. “I’m Shannon. Shannon Miles. Obviously you’ve met my son, Cooper.”

  I dipped my chin. Would have tipped my hat, had I been wearing one. “Benjamin Gaines.” I went by Ben. Wasn’t sure why I’d given her my full name like that.

  “It’s nice to meet you, Benjamin. Would you like to come over to the house? I made cookies.”

  “Cookies?” Cooper asked, his face lighting up with so much joy, it was hard not to agree—cookies sounded like the best thing in the world when he said it like that.

  But making friends with these people wasn’t a good idea. I wouldn’t be here long. A season, maybe two, then I’d move on. I always had to move on. It was the only way.

  “No, that’s—”

  “Cookies,” Cooper said, looking me straight in the eyes. His little voice was suddenly so serious, a baffling depth of meaning hidden in that one little word. It was as if he’d said, You need to come have cookies with me, Ben, your life depends on it.

  I stared at the little boy in his mother’s arms. His bright blue eyes watched me as if my answer to this request meant the world to him. For reasons I couldn’t possibly fathom, I didn’t want to let him down.

  “Sure,” I said, pulling my gaze away from his hypnotic eyes. “I’d love a cookie.”

  “Cookie,” Cooper said, his tone assured, as if that settled the matter.

  I followed them down the low hill, the back of their house coming into view. It was a beautiful home—from the outside, anyway—with a big wrap-around porch and a garden in the back. Shannon’s two other boys were there, playing near the raised beds. Or the younger one was playing, at least. Her oldest son watched his mother with crossed arms, his brow furrowed. He looked so serious for a child who could only be around six.

  “Where was Cooper?” he asked.

  “In the vineyard,” Shannon said. “This is Benjamin. He found him.”

  The boy marched toward me and stuck out his arm. It took me a second to realize what he wanted. I clasped his hand and shook.

  “I’m Roland Miles,” he said. “That’s my brother Leo.”

  “You have very proper manners, Roland Miles,” I said. “I’m Ben.”

  The other little boy, Leo, had lighter hair—almost blond—but the same blue eyes. He sat in the dirt surrounded by little toy cars. He drove two into each other, making crashing noises and spitting. His eyes darted up to mine and he smiled, but didn’t seem interested in a handshake greeting like his brother.

  Shannon put Cooper down, grabbed a pair of shorts that were sitting nearby, and pulled them on him. “You stay put, you hear me? Or no cookie.”

  “Okay, Mommy.”

  She glanced at Roland. “I’m going inside to get cookies and lemonade. Can you watch your brother for two minutes?”

  “Yes,” Roland said. Shannon jogged around the side of the house, and Roland rolled his eyes. “Cooper won’t keep his clothes on. And he runs away every time.”

  “Sounds like your baby brother is a handful.”

  Roland sighed. “You have no idea.”

  The little one didn’t seem like he was a flight risk now. Maybe the promise of a cookie was enough to keep him still.

  I sat down on the edge of a raised garden bed. I probably shouldn’t have stayed. It felt odd to sit out here with these kids. Hurt in places I didn’t want to feel. I’d have to take a cookie to be polite, then be on my way. Keep my distance from now on.

  Cooper wandered over to me, and as if he’d known me his whole life, crawled right up into my lap. He patted my beard with his little hand and smiled. “Hi, Ben.”

  In that moment, Cooper Miles broke me.

  The hard shell I’d constructed around my heart cracked wide open. It was as if a rush of fresh air surged through me, cleaning out the cold, empty spaces I’d closed off. For years, I’d kept that armor around my heart, sure it was the only way I’d survive. Stay alone. Don’t let anyone inside.

  That little boy made me crumble with just a pat to my chin.

  I swallowed hard, overcome with a sudden rush of emotion. Cooper rubbed his palm against my facial hair, giggling, like it tickled. His laugh was so light, his smile so pure.

  I’d met their father, Lawrence. He’d hired me. It was hard to believe this joyful little spark had come from that man. From what I knew of Lawrence Miles, he was serious and demanding. I’d worked for worse, but the idea of this bright little boy being raised by a man like him made my chest ache.

  For reasons I didn’t understand, I desperately wanted Cooper to keep whatever it was that burned so brightly inside him.

  Roland glanced at me again and his little shoulders relaxed. He sat down next to Leo and grabbed a car. It was as if he’d let his guard down and could finally play. Was it because I had his brother? It was hard to be sure.

  Leo crashed his car into Roland’s and the two erupted with laughter. Cooper kicked his legs and laughed along with his brothers.

  Shannon came around the side of the house carrying a tray with a plate of cookies, a pitcher of lemonade, and a stack of plastic cups. “Okay, here we are.”

  “Cookies!” Cooper exclaimed.

  She set the tray on the edge of another garden bed. Roland and Leo sprang up and stood in front of her.

  “Your hands are filthy, but… oh well.” She handed them each a cookie and a cup of lemonade, then looked over at Cooper, still sitting in my lap. “Wow. He must like you. He doesn’t do that very often.”

  “Doesn’t do what?”

  “Sit. He’s either moving or sleeping. There’s not much in between.” She grabbed two cookies and brought them over, handing one to Cooper, the other to me. “Thank you again. I know a cookie isn’t really enough thanks, but it’s the best I can do on short notice.”

  I adjusted Cooper in my lap. The weight of his little body was comforting, somehow. As were the satisfied smiles of the other boys. “No need for anything else. This is perfect.”

  By the time I finished my cookie, Cooper’s brief adventure in sitting still was over. He scrambled down from my lap, darted for the tray, snatched another cookie, and tried to run.

  But I was faster than he was. I caught him around the waist and spun him around while he squealed with delight.

  “Nice try, little man.”

  “Oh, Cooper,” Shannon said. The poor woman sounded so tired. “Okay, buddy. Containment strategy number two. Time to go inside.”

  I helped her bring the snack into the house. It felt awkward to be in her home, so I quickl
y made for the door. Stopping in the doorway, I nodded to her.

  “Thanks again for the snack. I’ll see you around.”

  “Thank you so much, Benjamin,” she said amid the chaos erupting at her feet. Cooper clung to one leg and Leo tugged on her shirt, trying to ask her a question. “Leo, wait one minute, please. Cooper, can you let go of my leg, honey? Mommy needs to walk.”

  I shut the door with a soft click and made my way down the porch steps.

  Shannon Miles didn’t know it, but her little boys had done something to me. Reminded me that a heart still beat in my chest. That maybe my life hadn’t ended.

  I let out a long breath as I walked to my truck. The sun was sinking toward the mountain peaks that surrounded Salishan Cellars, the air already cooling. And something told me that wasn’t the last time I’d chase down a naked Cooper Miles in the vineyard.

  Two

  Ben

  Present day

  Sparks danced into the night sky, carried up by currents of air I couldn’t feel. The fire blazed hot, licking the edges of my mattress, the coals at the bottom glowing bright red. I’d stacked wood around the base to keep it going even once the mattress itself burned out. Made for a nice big bonfire.